with so much time spent lately being sad and wanting-- i have forgotten to remember all of the things i love about being with just me. i love reading to myself. and i love making myself coffee. and i love getting ready when i'm ready to and going where i need to be to do things for myself. i love me because i don't argue with me. i love me because i'm rooting for me. me thinks i deserve the best. and if i love being with me, then other people probably do too, and that's enough to turn my mood around. at least sometimes-- when i allow it.
i'm not conceited. i'm not pompous or hard to get a long with. i am only saying...
i love simple things and simple times and often i just feel like everything good happens to everyone but me. but sometimes things are slow and i have to remind myself that at least i'm lucky to spend so much time on my own without being bothered or pestered. i'm single and i don't have kids and all i have is a list of to-dos and i ought to be thankful of that because that's something special and rare and might not always be...
my life is slow right now. i'm in some in-between places. i'm watching a lot of people swirl around and they have so much going on they can't think straight. but i can think all day long if i want to-- about books i want to read and things i'd like to do on sundays when i have a man-- in the future. and art i'm dying to make... i make myself feel guilty a lot for the things i'm not doing.
i think about these things a lot and i'm very lucky to even have dreams. i'm privileged.
i really am.
and i'm finally in that perfect place again where i can read and be still without my mind wandering...
i finally realized all of this and i don't really think about what i'm "missing" anymore.
it's not easy to love being alone, but ever so often i actually do-- love being alone.
it's only time.
About Me
- All Is Truth
- Thinker. Artist. Evolving. Want want wanting. Reader. People watcher. Struggler. Etc.
jodi, this makes my heart smile. :) I am almost in tears right here in my office, because this makes me so very happy to see you say.
ReplyDeleteAnd just want you to know (you already to)that I'm rooting for you too. And damnit, you will be everything you ever wanted to in life. Just let yourself do it. Just let yourself be.
I love you, to the next galaxy far away and back again. And that's really far. ;)
please, can you make something similar for me!? http://www.etsy.com/listing/58476388/custom-hand-carved-rubber-stamp-of-your?ref=sr_gallery_5&ga_search_query=custom%2Brubber%2Bstamps&ga_search_type=handmade&ga_page=5
ReplyDeletealso, you need one for your pottery too! text me!!
oh my god that stamp is gorgeous. we need more MooCarve. And. Yes, I can absolutely try. Craft time, this weekend? I need to screen print too, for my LOVE CHILD project.
ReplyDeletesketch me up an image and we'll get started. carving is fun, especially on MooCARVE. cuts like buttahhhhhh.
ReplyDeleteCOME ON! That'll be fun! Just give me a hollerrr, you're more than welcome! :)
ReplyDelete