I made love to myself in the mirror, kissing my own lips, saying, "I love myself, I love you more than anybody."

New is only new when it's new.

 <3

 Just lovely.

 One of the best images I've seen in a while. Thanks, Byron.

getting tatted soon. (UPDATED)

                                        Manipura, Solar Plexus Chakra.                                          

 

above the scar in between my tits...

(image from January 2009-- two months after surgery which was November 14, 2008) 

Tattooed on August 3rd, 2011 at Santa Fe Tattoo Parlor by the very awesome Mr. Johnny Johno.

This is an image of my tumor. (6.7 lbs.) 

The piece of paper represents 2 centimeters.

Frida.

This is one of the first images I put on this blog. 

These are ovarian tumor cells and cross-sections.

Chakras. 

There's not much separating us. 

Jerry Uelsmann, 1972, Seaweed Womb.

Quite lovely and painful. 

Brilliant, elegant, introspective, quiet, etc. 

about making art...

this is one of the first bits of information i was told as an art major...

it's true.

i have got to stop chasing them boys away... damn.

Blog contributor #1.

"wanna hear a really disturbing story about mind control?

surrre

okay. so its called neuro linguistic programming, or NLP. the majority of research done in the 70s. well some sick guys have used it in stuff they later coined "forbidden method"

its conditioning someone to react a certain way to a trained command. and this guy would immediately after sleeping with this chick...say something to drop her pleasure into fear. like; he'd point at the door and say "What would it be like if I just up and walked out the door, slammed it, and you could never open it again." of course which would upset her, and then he'd raise her back up by cuddling and being sweet.

Then once she was calm and feeling all warm n fuzzy again. He'd tell another terrible story. Again involving the door getting slammed like, he walks out, slams the door, and then later is hit by a bus and she never gets to see him again.

so this guy anchored feelings of terror and fear of loss of those warm fuzzy feelings with the door getting slammed. and put the last nail in the conditioning, by getting up, going to the bathroom and slamming the door... and reportedly, since then, all he does is direct her attention to a door, and it makes her, i dunno. immediately stop doing something he didn't like

tell me thats not some really sinister stuff

 wow. 
i dig it. 
that's what you're contributing to my blog. thanks.

lol.
no problem. its a story thats been haunting me since i read it the other day."


-Caleb Countryman.
at: http://www.crashedgates.blogspot.com/

My blog hit over 10,000 pageviews today. :]

Melodie Fay "Puff" Sexton

I wanted to post this because it is a terrible loss. From the first instant I ever saw her, I honestly thought she had to be the most beautiful woman I had ever seen in my entire life. I saw her walking back from lunch one day in high school. She was sitting outside reading "The Perks of Being a Wallflower" which I bought not long after. Now-- that was years and years ago. I just now, a few months ago, got around to actually reading the book. It's such a strange thing. So strange. I remember, a few days later after seeing her, and my cousin, Ryan, told me she thought I was a lesbian or something because he told her how beautiful I thought she was and I didn't mind. Seriously. She is stunning. I'm not the only one who thought that. Hearing of her death is so terrible to me. She has a three year old son.

If there's anyone reading this; please donate money to her son.

I just cannot believe it. I really can't. I wish I had known her at all. The only thing I have ever known of her is knowing her beauty. And maybe that's all I could have wished for. God knows I would not have been able to be able to handle her death beyond that. I am so sorry for her family and her friends and especially her son. I cannot imagine the loss. Rest peacefully, Melodie, I know you were loved by so many and admired by even more.

sometimes the types of decisions i have to make are as simple as:

shower or bath?
should i go drink beers with my friends or no?
cold pizza or re heated pizza? with ranch or no?
side braid or librarian bun?

and to these questions today i choose:
shower,
yes,
reheated with ranch
and side braid probably. who knows.
i do what i want, bitch!

love her.

that's the most beautiful braid i've ever seen.

dear andy,
you're beautiful to me.

if that's the case, i've had one. and yes. it is too painful.

"People think a soul mate is your perfect fit, and that's what everyone wants. But a true soul mate is a mirror, the person who shows you everything that is holding you back, the person who brings you to your own attention so you can change your life.

A true soul mate is probably the most important person you'll ever meet, because they tear down your walls and smack you awake. But to live with a soul mate forever? Nah. Too painful. Soul mates, they come into your life just to reveal another layer of yourself to you, and then leave.

A soul mates purpose is to shake you up, tear apart your ego a little bit, show you your obstacles and addictions, break your heart open so new light can get in, make you so desperate and out of control that you have to transform your life, then introduce you to your spiritual master..."
— Elizabeth Gilbert (Eat, Pray, Love)